I’m a person who’s partner is trans. For much of our journey I created blog posts, which I’ll be sharing here from time to time. If for no other reason than to share what goes through my head, and maybe explain a little bit of what it is to be a partner of someone who transitions.
It is done! We have moved and are reasonably settled into our new home. The strange thing is, that even though it is rented, it feels like home. Perhaps it’s because it’s a house, rather than a flat and it has a garden and it’s just us. I think if I were to buy a house, it would be just like this one.
The move itself was interesting for lots of reasons. Firstly, just having men around who were helping us move brought into sharp focus the difference between having men around and not. The male smell with all that testosterone was far from attractive to me, and the fact that there was so much of our stuff that was completely unfathomable to them, like my beautiful new coat stand shaped like a woman, our mugs that are bone china and painted by Natasha Law, who as Wikipedia puts it, “is known for her sexy line drawings which lie on the boundary between art and fashion. Her work also features strong and evident erotic undertones…”. Ahem. Exactly.
I suppose it seals the deal, for me there is no turning back to ‘hetero-land’. It is more than just the mugs and the man-smell though, it’s the realisation as I saw everything that we have collected as we’ve built our life together, she is the one. The only one. And as much as we sometimes have our little spats, the reality is that fundamentally deep down inside we are connected. We are a single unit. The trans thing doesn’t matter, the history doesn’t matter, we are who we are. And we are better together.
I think the key message I would like to scream from the rooftops, is that no matter how much she changes from the hormones, the voice training and all the other changes that have happened and are due to happen, she is the same person. She is my person. And I love her to bits.
(Originally Dated 09/05/2012)